The Ten E-Mail Commandments:

1) You must try your best to spell everything correctly. If I ever spot a "u" or "ur" replacing "you" or "your/you're," I will nuke the Earth from orbit. I recommend running spell check if you're incapable of spelling things on your own.

2) It's not a good idea to write me an e-mail if you don't have a comprehensive understanding of how grammar works, so if you can't manage that, then don't bother.

3) If the above didn't already tip you off, only send me e-mails in the English language.

4) No spamming. Anyone who spams continuously will be kicked in the face.

5) No attachments. Any e-mail I see with an attachment will be deleted, with its author tracked and convicted of committing a serious felony: ticking me off.

6) Do not ask me to add illegal content such as ROMs or Warez. This isn't The Pirate Bay.

7) Don't ask me to advertise your content on my site, unless you're willing to pay me. In the event that payment is offered, I will gladly advertise your content. I'm easily swayed.

8) When e-mailing me about an error around the site, please tell me as much information about the error as possible. You clicked on a link and it didn't work? Tell me what shows up when you click it. Does it say 404? 403? Tell me. If I'm going to fix the problem, I need to know what and where it is, first.

9) Please, try to avoid personal questions. As much as you would simply love to know my home address, phone number, height, weight, where THAT thing came from, and how long the universe has existed; none of that is relevant to the site.

10) If you're going to criticize me, I advise you to do it intelligently. I have a zero tolerance policy when it comes to morons.

With that all said and done, you might still do a stupid thing like send me an attachment or something of a grammatical nightmare. Make no mistake: I will NOT make exceptions if you blatantly avoid these guidelines. If I see things I don't like in my inbox, they will be deleted.

Now, type in your e-mail address, your name, a subject, and a message in the appropriate boxes, then click the "submit" button. Clicking on "reset" will erase the information you've entered, so be careful. Be sure to confirm that you're human, because I hate spam bots. Also, put in your real e-mail address if you expect a response.

Yes No
Male Female
Xbox One PlayStation 4 Switch